Being diagnosed with multiple sclerosis (MS) can feel overwhelming. The uncertainty, the flood of medical information, and the sudden shift in expectations can make it hard to know where to start. Qwyncile Harris understands that feeling all too well.

Qwincyle was diagnosed in 2020 — just two weeks after getting married. The timing added an extra layer of uncertainty.

“My initial reaction was just fear,” she admitted. “I was really scared.”

She wasn’t just afraid of what the disease might bring, but also of how it might impact her new marriage. Would her husband understand? Would he be willing to take this journey with her?

“I think I probably was more scared than I should have been,” she reflected. “But at the time, you don’t know that because you don’t know if the person is going to be receptive to it.”

Thankfully, her fears were eased by a conversation with her new husband that, while difficult, brought reassurance. “That conversation was very scary, but I’m glad we had it, and he’s been a really big support system throughout all of this.”

Finding Community: ‘You Don’t Have To Explain Yourself’

For Qwincyle, having a strong support system made all the difference. Whether it was through her husband, online communities, or other people with MS sharing their experiences, knowing she wasn’t alone helped ease the weight of her diagnosis.

“It’s important to have a support system when navigating MS because there are a lot of things that you don’t know,” she said.

One of the most comforting aspects of finding people who understand MS firsthand was not having to constantly explain herself. “Having someone who understands the things that you’re going through, where you don’t have to feel like you have to explain yourself — it’s just so much better.”

In her search for knowledge and reassurance, Qwincyle turned to the internet, finding comfort in the stories of others. “I started finding different people who had YouTube channels about having MS, and I just started watching vlogs — just what people experience with the day-to-day medication that they were on,” she said.

Seeing people live long, fulfilling lives with MS — even those who were diagnosed before today’s advanced treatments — gave her a sense of hope.

“That was probably the first time I got a little peace around it because I understood that people were living with this, and they had been living long lives with this,” she said. “So it brought me a little bit of relief, [and] hope to think, ‘This is something that I have to deal with for the rest of my life, but it’s something that it sounds like I could possibly manage.’”

Her Best Advice? Don’t Panic

Looking back, Qwincyle has one key piece of advice for anyone newly diagnosed with MS: “Don't panic,” she said. “There’s not an answer for you specifically, but you can find something that works for you.”

Managing MS is not a one-size-fits-all experience, and she quickly learned that what works for one person may not work for another. “People have different ideas of, ‘This works for me and this almost cures this for me.’ And it doesn’t work for everyone,” she explained. “I’ve tried so many different things that just do not work. And if you do not give yourself that space and that grace to say, ‘Hey, you’re not going to figure it out today or tomorrow.’ And if we’re being honest, a year from now you may not have it either, but it’s OK. You will be in a much better place.”

For Qwincyle, one of the hardest lessons was accepting that her experience of time itself had changed. “You have to give yourself the grace to understand that time isn’t like it used to be," she said. “Things are going to be different.”

Redefining Success: Celebrating the Little Wins

With MS, life doesn’t always look the way it once did — but that doesn’t mean it’s without victories. Qwincyle has learned to redefine what success looks like for her.

“You could focus on those things and then you could be depressed about it, and you can be sad, and you can mourn who you once were,” she said. “Or you can be happy that, ‘I was able to do cardio for 15 minutes today,’ or ‘I was able to go to the grocery store and I made it in and out without having to sit down somewhere.’”

For Qwincyle, these small wins matter. “They may not be what you’re used to, and they may not be what other people would deem as accomplishments,” she acknowledged. “But to you, those little wins really matter, and they make you feel better and let you know that this journey that you are on — that is yours — it can be successful, whatever it may look like to you.”

By focusing on what she’s still capable of instead of what she’s lost, Qwincyle has found a way to navigate MS with resilience and hope. And for those just starting out on their own MS journey, her message is simple: take it one day at a time, give yourself grace, and celebrate every step forward — no matter how small.

Talk With Others Who Understand

On MyMSTeam, the social network for people with MS and their loved ones, more than 219,000 members come together to ask questions, give advice, and share their stories with others who understand life with MS.

What do you wish you’d known when you were first diagnosed with MS? What advice do you have for others who are newly diagnosed? Share your experience in the comments below, or start a conversation by posting on your Activities page.

Return home